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I lay awake nursing a new baby boy, a fresh slice of heaven nestled on my chest.

I soak in the stillness of the night. I bask in the beauty of this moment.

I rub the soles of his feet with my thumb and I watch his tiny toes curl in and out.

I stroke the sides of his face, paving a trail from the lobes of his ears, to the thickness of his cheeks, to the curve of his chin.

I hold his hands. I graze his palms and wait…wait for all his little fingers to wrap around just one of mine.

I breathe in.
I breathe out.

I let the love flow, from my heart to his, like electricity, surging fast and fierce.

I breathe in.
I breathe out and I let go.

This time, the third time, I know how quickly they grow, how fast time flies. It marches onward, never slowing.

I breathe in.
I breathe out….and I pray, yielding this child to God.

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I pray this baby, this child, knows the measures I would take, the distances I would travel, to get to him, to be near him, but I pray this child knows HE would go farther.

I pray this child sees the sacrifices I have made and will make to give him a life better than what I have lived, but I pray this child knows HE already sacrificed it all, to give him more than I ever could.

I pray that this child always knows and feels my love, that it covers and washes over him, but I pray more than anything that he knows as much as I love him, HE loves him more.

Amen.

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